Last weekend was my race weekend. Oh my god! I don’t know how the put it, but it was beyond amazing. I still feel too excited to make this a good quality writing piece, but I will give it a try.
It started Friday with free practice day. We had two dry sessions and then it started raining again. Yes, again. The weather wasn’t good all week, hard wind, cold and a lot of rain. More looked like fall than spring. But we still can’t control the weather, so we skipped the third session, the track was too wet and too slippery. Without rain tires it’s way too slippery and I still don’t like slippery. I hate rain and I hate slippery. The last session we had to do three starts procedure, so we decided to only do the starts in the pouring rain and then off to the pitlane. Despite of the rain I had a wonderful day, because I had a new PR in my second session. I was so excited about that!
On Sunday I woke up being really nervous. The were some pretty fast and serious race ladies on the startinggrid and I’m a real race rookie. I don’t have that much racing skills and my equipment is a bit challenging. My motor isn’t really build for racing, although if you’re good rider, you can have a lot of fun on the track with my Monster. I’m still not that good, I’m getting better each time though!
Still I couldn’t shake off that feeling, that I just didn’t belong there at the starting grid. I’m not that good and that fast, what the hell am I doing here? I had that feeling before I registered for the race, after I registered and right before the race. Sometimes the feeling was overwhelming that almost took all the fun out of it. Luckily I had a solid, good and sincere group of friens around me, who supported me and gave me peptalks, tips and everything I needed.
Before the warm-up lap my stomach hurt, I really thought I had to vomit in my helmet, I litterally was sick to my stomach. Just nerves, I was so nervous! After the warm-up lap it was better, still nervous, but not as much as before. Being at the starting grid with the umbrella boys was a unique experience. Once the race started, my nerves were gone. I got into the flow and just did what I was thought to do. I finished last. But dead last is beter than not finishing at all. I even got lapped twice by the fastest lady. And you what, I didn’t care.
The ladies competing are way more experienced with much faster bikes. When I see them ride, I mean damn, they’re good! Really good!
After finishing riding to the pitlane waving to all the marshalls (they all wave at you finished the race, just like in the MotoGP) Of course I waved back! I felt like the champ even dead last! I started to cry a bit in my helmet, just of happiness and the tension just left my body. I was so happy and I felt so awesome, that I did what I wanted to do for so long! That feeling of accomplishing a dream is just priceless!
Even if you are not good at it, you just have to have passion for it. I am competitive and I really like to win, but it’s the passion and the love for what I do, that makes me thrive. And even in doubt, keep on going. It will be great and awesome.
Next year again? 😉